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November 2nd, 2009
10:20 am - End of an era
So as of today, I no longer work at Konami. The specific reasoning behind it is more than I care to go into in a public posting, but suffice it to say it wasn't entirely voluntary, nor was it (in my opinion) entirely my fault. Over the past couple months, I had felt the position was moving away from where it was when I started, and was moving far more into a "marketing" role, that I'm both not too adept at, and not too comfortable with.
That being said, I'm quite satisfied with the current state of affairs in my life. I'm exploring quite a few options to dive back into doing something productive, but I have at least a few months to really figure stuff out. To list a few possibilities: go back into video games, government work, nonprofit humanitarian efforts, regular college, music college, or maybe education again. In the meantime, I've got more than enough savings to tide me over, plus unemployment which is some ridiculously large amount, as well as part time work as a tutor or giving music lessons.
I've been a lot more active socially in the past few weeks and months than I've ever been before, and what started as a conscious effort has become a lot easier over time. Combined with my new "freedom", I'm really looking forward to where life takes me in the next few months and coming year. I'm not the type to make solid plans, but I have faith that with positive effort and a friendly demeanor, something will come my way =)
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July 5th, 2009
10:19 pm - Edgar Allen Poe Reviews a Jug of Milk
Once upon a mid-day sunny, while I savored Nuts 'N Honey,
With my Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 gal, 128 fl. oz., I swore
As I went on with my lapping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at the icebox door.
'Bad condensor, that,' I muttered, 'vibrating the icebox door -
Only this, and nothing more.'
Not to sound like a complainer, but, in an inept half-gainer,
I provoked my bowl to tip and spill its contents on the floor.
Stupefied, I came to muddle over that increasing puddle,
Burgeoning deluge of that which I at present do adore -
Snowy Tuscan wholesomeness exclusively produced offshore -
Purg'ed here for evermore.
And the pool so white and silky, filled me with a sense of milky
Ardor of the type fantastic of a loss not known before,
So that now, to still the throbbing of my heart, while gently sobbing,
I retreated, heading straightway for the tempting icebox door -
Heedless of that pitter-patter tapping at the icebox door -
I resolved to have some more.
Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
'This,' said I, 'requires an extra dram of milk, my favorite pour.'
To the icebox I aspired, motivated to admire
How its avocado pigment complemented my decor.
Then I grasped its woodgrain handle - here I opened wide the door; -
Darkness there, and nothing more.
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams of Tuscans I had known before
But the light inside was broken, and the darkness gave no token,
And the only words there spoken were my whispered words, 'No more!'
Coke and beer, some ketchup I set eyes on, and an apple core -
Merely this and nothing more.
Back toward the table turning, all my soul within me burning,
Soon again I heard a tapping somewhat louder than before.
'Surely,' said I, 'surely that is something at my window lattice;
Let me see then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore -
Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore; -
'Tis the wind and nothing more!'
From the window came a stirring, then, with an incessant purring,
Inside stepped a kitten; mannerlessly did she me ignore.
Not the least obeisance made she; not a minute stopped or stayed she;
But, with mien of lord or lady, withdrew to my dining floor -
Pounced upon the pool of Tuscan spreading o'er my dining floor -
Licked, and lapped, and supped some more.
Then this tiny cat beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grand enthusiasm of the countenance she wore,
Toward the mess she showed no pity, 'til I said, 'Well, hello, kitty!'
Sought she me with pretty eyes that seemed to open some rapport.
So I pleaded, 'Tell me, tell me what it is that you implore!'
Quoth the kitten, 'Get some more.'
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June 28th, 2009
11:46 am - Age Before Booty
I'm 22 now. I think I'll buy myself something nice.
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June 17th, 2009
12:02 am - Back in the Estados Unidos da América
I'm back safe and sound from Brasilia. Spent nearly half of my past 5 days on a plane or in an airport, but the remaining time spent was pretty well worth it. I got a ton of pictures, quite a bit for work purposes, but I managed to get in some touristy stuff as well. I'll make a more complete entry when I get my pictures and thoughts together for my formal report, but for now, I'm exhausted, and I'm going to bed.
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June 11th, 2009
08:52 pm - E3 and Brazil
So last week was E3, and I had a ballin time playin' DDR on the floor for like three days straight. I got to teach a bunch of middle aged ladies how to play, and probably convinced most of them to buy it for their kids (or for them). A couple people stuck around and played a bunch to practice for free, I didn't mind that either. I was pretty glad to finally meet Eddie L. from bemanistyle, I'm not sure how we've managed to not run into each other over the years. I definitely wouldn't mind hangin' out with him and his crew, they seem like cool people. But the highlight had to be when the booth babes came around. They usually brought a crowd with 'em, jumped on the pads with a bunch of "WOO"s and stuff, and it was up to little ol' me to teach 'em how to play right. I was actually pretty surprised, a number of them picked it up really quickly, but no one really gave a fuck, it was just fun to watch em play.
So mid-E3 I get word from my boss that we finally have approval to take a trip to a Pro Evolution Soccer tournament we're helping run in Brazil on June 12th. He had some important meeting this Friday, so couldn't go, so he wanted to send me instead. Slight wrench in the works, I didn't have a Brazilian visa. So I took off to the consulate during one of my breaks from E3, put in my application, and crossed my fingers. The expected date for my visa to complete was June 16th, but the guy seemed to imply I could come in early to check. So we put an itinerary on hold, and I went in and checked today, and voila, it was there! Cue me running around today trying to get everything in order before I leave tomorrow at 9am. I think I've got everything set, but I'm still pretty nervous. Not only my first real business trip, my first real trip to a developing country! I'll try to take a bunch of pictures, and try to keep my wallet safe. If any of you guys want me to bring you back something specific, I'll do my best, but I make no promises =)
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May 22nd, 2009
09:56 am - Electron Band Structure In Germanium, My Ass
Abstract: The exponential dependence of resistivity on temperature in germanium is found to be a great big lie. My careful theoretical modeling and painstaking experimentation reveal 1) that my equipment is crap, as are all the available texts on the subject and 2) that this whole exercise was a complete waste of my time.
Introduction
Electrons in germanium are confined to well-defined energy bands that are separated by "forbidden regions" of zero charge-carrier density. You can read about it yourself if you want to, although I don't recommend it. You'll have to wade through an obtuse, convoluted discussion about considering an arbitrary number of non-coupled harmonic-oscillator potentials and taking limits and so on. The upshot is that if you heat up a sample of germanium, electrons will jump from a non-conductive energy band to a conductive one, thereby creating a measurable change in resistivity. This relation between temperature and resistivity can be shown to be exponential in certain temperature regimes by waving your hands and chanting "to first order".
Experiment procedure
I sifted through the box of germanium crystals and chose the one that appeared to be the least cracked. Then I soldered wires onto the crystal in the spots shown in figure 2b of Lab Handout 32. Do you have any idea how hard it is to solder wires to germanium? I'll tell you: real goddamn hard. The solder simply won't stick, and you can forget about getting any of the grad students in the solid state labs to help you out.
Once the wires were in place, I attached them as appropriate to the second-rate equipment I scavenged from the back of the lab, none of which worked properly. I soon wised up and swiped replacements from the well-stocked research labs. This is how they treat undergrads around here: they give you broken tools and then don't understand why you don't get any results.
In order to control the temperature of the germanium, I attached the crystal to a copper rod, the upper end of which was attached to a heating coil and the lower end of which was dipped in a thermos of liquid nitrogen. Midway through the project, the thermos began leaking. That's right: I pay a cool ten grand a quarter to come here, and yet they can't spare the five bucks to ensure that I have a working thermos.
Results
Check this shit out (Fig. 1). That's bonafide, 100%-real data, my friends. I took it myself over the course of two weeks. And this was not a leisurely two weeks, either; I busted my ass day and night in order to provide you with nothing but the best data possible. Now, let's look a bit more closely at this data, remembering that it is absolutely first-rate. Do you see the exponential dependence? I sure don't. I see a bunch of crap.
Christ, this was such a waste of my time.
Banking on my hopes that whoever grades this will just look at the pictures, I drew an exponential through my noise. I believe the apparent legitimacy is enhanced by the fact that I used a complicated computer program to make the fit. I understand this is the same process by which the top quark was discovered.
Conclusion
Going into physics was the biggest mistake of my life. I should've declared CS. I still wouldn't have any women, but at least I'd be rolling in cash.
http://pages.cs.wisc.edu/~kovar/hall.html
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May 4th, 2009
07:08 pm - Fuck
This Article is as simple and provocative as its title suggests: it explores the legal implications of the word fuck. The intersection of the word fuck and the law is examined in four major areas: First Amendment, broadcast regulation, sexual harassment, and education. The legal implications from the use of fuck vary greatly with the context. To fully understand the legal power of fuck, the nonlegal sources of its power are tapped. Drawing upon the research of etymologists, linguists, lexicographers, psychoanalysts, and other social scientists, the visceral reaction to fuck can be explained by cultural taboo. Fuck is a taboo word. The taboo is so strong that it compels many to engage in self-censorship. This process of silence then enables small segments of the population to manipulate our rights under the guise of reflecting a greater community. Taboo is then institutionalized through law, yet at the same time is in tension with other identifiable legal rights. Understanding this relationship between law and taboo ultimately yields fuck jurisprudence.
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April 21st, 2009
April 1st, 2009
March 24th, 2009
08:55 pm - Cast Iron Chef
My cast iron pan is my new best friend. Took me a little while to get used to it, and I burned the hell out of my hand more than once on accident during that acclimation period, but I think I'm getting the hang of it now. At least, I've got my steak, egg, and pancake techniques down pat, and as of tonight, I've got a pretty good hamburger method as well. I'm doing my best to learn a new technique every week or so, to expand my repertoire.
My slow cooker has recently fallen to the wayside with my new infatuation, but it's still consistently proving its value. Stew and pot roast tend to appear in it from time to time with basically zero effort. Should I decide to branch out, it's still basically a no-risk environment for experimentation, as at the very worst, even the most off-base entree can simply be transformed into a passable stew.
I don't think I've developed a "passion" for cooking or anything, but I've found I really enjoy it, for the simple reason that I really enjoy eating tasty things. I've also found that even though my initial instincts are to make as many cakes as possible and consume them immediately, I'm usually able to overcome those urges. And with a little planning, I tend to eat much healthier at home than I do out and about. Once I figure out a reasonable and reliable way to transport that food to work, I'll have much better control over what exactly I'm eating. Hooray!
Speaking of work, it's going swimmingly. It's been a little over two months since I started in my new Marketing position, and I've learned and absorbed an incredible amount of information just by doing various things. I'm nowhere near completely self-sufficient yet, so I'm really glad my boss is totally willing to help me with things I'm unfamiliar with. At the same time, he's not into micro-managing, and has given me a number of initiatives to go ahead and do on my own, and one is already looking to be shaping up nicely. The other one I still haven't managed to find time to sit down and do, but the ideas are floating around, I just have to get them on paper. Anyway, I'm really happy with how things are turning out, and I see lots of awesome little (and big!) opportunities in the future for me there, and I'm going to work towards making those happen =)
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March 4th, 2009
09:53 pm - Finally
So I've taken another few steps towards actually validating my place in the video game industry, and am now the owner of a 60gig backwards compatible PS3, and an Xbox 360 Elite. I don't know if I'll ever be as much of a "gamer" as a lot of people, and I honestly don't know where in the day they find the time to play games for fun, I mean by the time I get home from a long day at work and eat dinner, the last thing I want to do is think about games more. But I do know that in order to be effective in my job, I can't just work on passing knowledge. So here goes.
I've been playing Metal Gear, Eden, Killzone 2, Flower, and Braid the most so far, but I'd like to expand my horizons. Recommend your favorite games, for any system, not just these two. I'm currently thinking of Psychonauts next (the guy I bought the Elite from has a ton of DLC games on here, and Psychonauts was actually a bit of a selling point for me), and after that we'll see about some of the Silent Hills, but I'm open to any suggestions. I don't care how old or new it is, I'm trying to work through a bunch of classics that I just wasn't around for.
Also, the Xbox isn't online yet cause I don't have one of those wireless thingamajiggers, but I believe my PS3 name is Duk_Amok. Feel free to add me or whatever it is you do with these things.
edit: Thanks Dickey! Xbox now online too, although I don't think I have a gold account anymore. I'll probably end up getting one eventually, but not yet.
edit2: Oh yeah I have a Wii too.
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February 25th, 2009
February 19th, 2009
03:34 pm - Shī Shì shí shī shǐ
Shíshì shīshì Shī Shì, shì shī, shì shí shí shī.
Shì shíshí shì shì shì shī.
Shí shí, shì shí shī shì shì.
Shì shí, shì Shī Shì shì shì.
Shì shì shì shí shī, shì shǐ shì, shǐ shì shí shī shìshì.
Shì shí shì shí shī shī, shì shíshì.
Shíshì shī, Shì shǐ shì shì shíshì.
Shíshì shì, Shì shǐ shì shí shì shí shī.
Shí shí, shǐ shí shì shí shī, shí shí shí shī shī.
Shì shì shì shì.
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February 17th, 2009
February 16th, 2009
09:26 pm - Challenges
Post a comment regarding anything and I will give you a choice of personalized challenges. If you complete either challenge, you shall receive a personalized reward as well. Complete both for bonus points.
Reply via comment when and if you are able to complete your challenge. Provide whatever proof you deem applicable. It need not be exhaustive, only believable.
Note: Feel free to complete someone else's challenge as well if you'd like. I can't promise bonus points for extra challenges completed, but I won't rule them out for an above-and-beyond performance either.
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February 13th, 2009
09:45 pm - Flower
Just finished Flower. An interesting game to say the least, although I'm a sucker for small artistic games. Eden was a lot of fun too, but I liked that one mainly for the main game mechanic that was reminiscent of that weird frogman game on XBLA, Wik and the Fable of Souls. Jumping around is tons of fun.
Anyway, life is going pretty well. I have a lot more actual work to do now, and it's a lot more challenging. I'm still a little nervous about it, because frankly I always get nervous when I don't do something absolutely perfect the first time. It's an unnatural feeling to me, since for so much of my life I've arbitrarily limited myself to the things I'm really good at. I challenged myself, but only when I knew I could succeed. It's a lot scarier doing it now when success isn't guaranteed, but it makes even the small victories a lot more rewarding. So far there haven't been many big victories, but I'm still learning, they'll come eventually =)
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11:13 am - Vogel v. Felice
A statement that the plaintiff is a "Dumb Ass," even first among "Dumb Asses," communicates no factual proposition susceptible of proof or refutation. It is true that "dumb" by itself can convey the relatively concrete meaning "lacking in intelligence." Even so, depending on context, it may convey a lack less of objectively assayable mental function than of such imponderable and debatable virtues as judgment or wisdom. Here defendant did not use "dumb" in isolation, but as part of the idiomatic phrase, "dumb ass." When applied to a whole human being, the term "ass" is a general expression of contempt essentially devoid of factual content. Adding the word "dumb" merely converts "contemptible person" to "contemptible fool." Plaintiffs were justifiably insulted by this epithet, but they failed entirely to show how it could be found to convey a provable factual proposition. If the meaning conveyed cannot by its nature be proved false, it cannot support a libel claim.
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February 2nd, 2009
09:36 pm - Note to self
Sun dried tomatoes, when cooked in a stew, become simply tomatoes.
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January 28th, 2009
12:27 pm
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dukamok's journal